Prognosis: A Memoir of My Brain
Author: Sarah Vallance
ISBN-10: 0525534105
ISBN-13: 978-0525534105
APA Style Citation
Vallance, S. (2019). Prognosis: A memoir of my brain. Little A.
Buy This Book
https://www.amazon.com/Prognosis-Memoir-Brain-Sarah-Vallance-ebook/dp/B07MDBSVNK/ref=tmm_kin_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr
Author: Sarah Vallance
ISBN-10: 0525534105
ISBN-13: 978-0525534105
APA Style Citation
Vallance, S. (2019). Prognosis: A memoir of my brain. Little A.
Buy This Book
https://www.amazon.com/Prognosis-Memoir-Brain-Sarah-Vallance-ebook/dp/B07MDBSVNK/ref=tmm_kin_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr
| prognosis_activity.pdf |
Book Description
Note: This book offers a perspective on traumatic brain injuries. The text mentions profanity, sexual activity, and suicidal thoughts. Please make sure to read before making a recommendation to students.
Prognosis: A Memoir of My Brain is a story told by Sarah Vallance of her recovery after falling from a horse, causing a severe traumatic brain injury (TBI). Her story takes you on a journey through her struggles with memory, employment, relationships, and survival. Sarah told her story so she could remember and record it, while acknowledging far too many individuals with TBIs cannot tell their story.
At the age of 31 Sarah was living in Australia and believed she was invincible. While riding a horse, she was thrown to the ground and hit her head on a rock. After regaining consciousness, she was confused and had a headache but could walk. The left side of her head hurt, but there was no visible mark. She thought she was fine and headed home. The next day she found her reading lamp in the refrigerator, her groceries in the sink, and her toaster in the freezer.
Sarah held an important government position, and upon returning to work, her boss noticed her left eye had turned inward slightly and didn't seem to move. He encouraged her to make a doctor's appointment and get a brain scan. She learned that she has a mild TBI, which can be used interchangeably with concussion, and they ran psychometric tests. The tests revealed her IQ was 80 (at age 11, she had an IQ of 127). The doctors sent her on her way and told her to avoid another blow to the head. Immediately she was saddened because she realized she would not be able to finish her PhD. She chose not to return to work. Eventually, she received a disability pension, but it was not much. Luckily, she had savings to help cover the next few months of bills.
Life as she once knew it changed for Sarah. Sleep became impossible, and she experienced vivid dreams. She was consumed with grief making her insomnia worse. She also turned to painkillers to help with the pain. Her ability to think was taken from her, and making choices confused her. Her biggest fear was appearing stupid in front of others. Her emotions centered around anger and depression. Rage robbed her of her self-respect. She would not see a specialist for the next nine years. Instead, she turned to drinking. She broke up with her boyfriend, and her challenging relationship with her mother only worsened.
Two months after the accident, she recognized her memory was terrible. She struggled with timing and chronology. She wanted to continue with her PhD but was having problems concentrating. Her thesis was about the influence of culture on administrative practice in Singapore, Thailand, and the Philippines. She poured over the books in her study and devoted the entire day to interpreting a single paragraph. Before the accident, she would read a book a day, now she settled for a page. Each sentence contained words she did not recognize or understand. Thinking caused her pain, but she continued to work and record the meaning of every word she didn't know into an empty notebook. She had forgotten how to type, and using a computer took forever. She would often write sentences with words that she didn't plan to use. Sarah's brain damage occurred in the language zone where the left parietal lobe met the temporal lobe. She struggled to understand written English for a couple of years after the accident. Each day she copied from her books and conducted what she believed to be important research. This was the reason she locked herself away from the world and stopped seeing her friends. But really, she could not let them see the person she had become. Sarah met someone in the park who was doing a thesis on head injuries and told her about how the brain repairs itself after trauma. After her chance meeting, this was her hope for her brain.
The next large chunk of time still remains a mystery for Sarah. While working on her PhD, she decided to travel, however, does not remember much. She remembers her job-hunting experience. She often used two expressions to trick people into thinking she was okay. First, she gave a long serious look or second, a look of mild curiosity. She had lost the art of conversation. Around 10-12 months after her injury, she accepted the job of policy director with a nonprofit organization in aged care. She was doing well until she was asked to give a presentation and take questions in front of a live audience. She was nervous, spoke too fast, and fumbled for answers. Later she approached her boss with a proposal: I will write the presentations, and you can give them. She learned to adapt and keep her brain injury a secret.
Sarah's personality and cognition changed. She found it hard to think, concentrate, and remember. Her charm disappeared along with her humor. Her impulse control vanished, and she had an unexpected side effect of craving sex. She explored her sexuality and drank heavily. Then she met Laura, an extrovert that made conversation easy. After ten weeks, they moved in together. Sarah loved her dogs, as they offered her unconditional positive regard. While Laura liked dogs, she believed they should be outside. These differences festered under the surface. Laura helped push Sarah to finish her PhD. She helped her break the material into small chunks, supported her, and brought her food. It was at Laura's suggestion that Sarah applied for a fellowship to live and study in the United States for a year. The distraction of a new city helped Sarah to forget about her depression and rage. She spent her days wandering the streets and exploring neighborhoods, but struggled to come up with a topic for her research and did not get along with her mentor. She met a friend that suggested that she transfer and finish her coursework under a friendlier mentor. She made the transfer, and at Harvard, she completed her case study for her dissertation.
Back in Australia, it had been four years since her accident, and she was starting to feel normal. On paper, no one would suspect that she had a damaged brain. In 1999, she became the HR manager at one of the largest papers in Australia. In 2000, she earned her PhD. In just five years, she achieved what she once thought was impossible. However, her temper started to become a roadblock. Because she could not control her anger, her relationship with Laura deteriorated. Sarah started to have affairs. In hopes of saving their relationship, she took a new job and moved with Laura to Melbourne. Within a few months, they separated, and Sarah had to put down one another of her beloved dogs.
In 2004, Sarah moved to Singapore. She was not ashamed about her sexuality but fiercely guarded the truth about her brain injury. Stigma exists around those with head injuries, such as being viewed as intellectually challenged, violent, unpredictable, and untrustworthy. This time of Sarah's life was marked by loneliness, travel, problems with her mother, and learning that she lost the ability to play violin. Years after her accident, she was still discovering new brain problems. Sarah met Giulia, who was 15 years younger. Quickly they fall in love, and Sarah shared her secret about her brain disorder. In 2008, Sarah took a job with a big Tobacco Company and moved to Hong Kong. Nine months later, Giulia moved there as well. Life began to resemble normalcy for Sarah.
In 2010, Sarah recognized problems with her memory. She was concerned she had Alzheimer's disease or CTE. She struggled with words and could not spell anymore. Her writing had become awkward. She went to the doctor and had another MRI done. There was no evidence for Alzheimer's disease, but there was significant atrophy around the motor cortex and some atrophy around the posterior parietal region and parieto-occipital cortex. She was told to cut back on alcohol, exercise four times a week, read, write, keep working, and take up a foreign language. She was also advised to keep a positive outlook. Sarah was consumed with her symptoms. She was told that for many smart people, it is hard for others to notice a decline. Frustrated with Sarah's moods and preoccupation with her symptoms, Giulia left her. Sarah retreated from life and stayed at home with her dogs and cats.
In 2013, at the age of 50, Sarah was researching euthanasia and considering ending her life. Soon after, she traveled to Sydney to see her neurologist and have more tests done. The MRI revealed that the brain changes were very slow and only in the area where she had her accident. It did not appear she had dementia, but the doctor wanted to run tests again in four years. Writing saved her brain after her accident, now she needed to get back to writing. Nothing stopped her depression, like helping an animal in need. She rescued a stray dog and named him Scout. Having a puppy helped her think about her life ten years into the future. She wanted to move back to Australia and reconcile her relationship with her mother. However, her mother's health and cognitive abilities were deteriorating, and it was taking a toll on Sarah. She started to see a psychiatrist who offered her some hope.
Sarah was lonely, so she tried online dating, but it didn't work. Finally, she met Louis, who happened to be a psycho-geriatrician specializing in dementia. Sarah told her the truth, and they fell quickly in love. Louis helped convince her that she did not have dementia. TBIs are complicated, and every TBI is different. Every brain is different. She pointed out Sarah wasted seven years worrying about something that didn't happened. She also helped Sarah navigate the relationship with her mother. In 2017, Louis and Sarah married in New York City. They live in Sydney and lead a simple life. On Sarah's wall is a quote by Norman Cousins: The tragedy of life is not death, but what we let die inside us while we live. Sarah decided to skip her next brain scan and live her life without fear.
Other Related Resources
Author's Website
https://sarahvallance.com/
BBC Outlook
https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/w3csyfcx
Psychological Concepts and Figures
ADHD
Aggression
Alcohol
Alzheimer's disease
Antidepressants
Autobiographical memory
Chronic traumatic encephalopathy (CTE)
Compensation
Concussion
Dementia
Depression
Dysphasia
Electroencephalogram (EEG)
Glasgow Coma Scale
Grammar
Impulse control
Insomnia
Introvert
IQ
Morphine
MRI
Musical alexia
Pain
Parietal lobe
Pica
Plasticity
Psychiatrist
Psychometric tests
Retrograde amnesia
Serial memory
Sexuality
Spectroscopy
Suicide
Syntax
Traumatic brain injury (TBI)
Unconditional positive regard
Visuospatial skills
Note: This book offers a perspective on traumatic brain injuries. The text mentions profanity, sexual activity, and suicidal thoughts. Please make sure to read before making a recommendation to students.
Prognosis: A Memoir of My Brain is a story told by Sarah Vallance of her recovery after falling from a horse, causing a severe traumatic brain injury (TBI). Her story takes you on a journey through her struggles with memory, employment, relationships, and survival. Sarah told her story so she could remember and record it, while acknowledging far too many individuals with TBIs cannot tell their story.
At the age of 31 Sarah was living in Australia and believed she was invincible. While riding a horse, she was thrown to the ground and hit her head on a rock. After regaining consciousness, she was confused and had a headache but could walk. The left side of her head hurt, but there was no visible mark. She thought she was fine and headed home. The next day she found her reading lamp in the refrigerator, her groceries in the sink, and her toaster in the freezer.
Sarah held an important government position, and upon returning to work, her boss noticed her left eye had turned inward slightly and didn't seem to move. He encouraged her to make a doctor's appointment and get a brain scan. She learned that she has a mild TBI, which can be used interchangeably with concussion, and they ran psychometric tests. The tests revealed her IQ was 80 (at age 11, she had an IQ of 127). The doctors sent her on her way and told her to avoid another blow to the head. Immediately she was saddened because she realized she would not be able to finish her PhD. She chose not to return to work. Eventually, she received a disability pension, but it was not much. Luckily, she had savings to help cover the next few months of bills.
Life as she once knew it changed for Sarah. Sleep became impossible, and she experienced vivid dreams. She was consumed with grief making her insomnia worse. She also turned to painkillers to help with the pain. Her ability to think was taken from her, and making choices confused her. Her biggest fear was appearing stupid in front of others. Her emotions centered around anger and depression. Rage robbed her of her self-respect. She would not see a specialist for the next nine years. Instead, she turned to drinking. She broke up with her boyfriend, and her challenging relationship with her mother only worsened.
Two months after the accident, she recognized her memory was terrible. She struggled with timing and chronology. She wanted to continue with her PhD but was having problems concentrating. Her thesis was about the influence of culture on administrative practice in Singapore, Thailand, and the Philippines. She poured over the books in her study and devoted the entire day to interpreting a single paragraph. Before the accident, she would read a book a day, now she settled for a page. Each sentence contained words she did not recognize or understand. Thinking caused her pain, but she continued to work and record the meaning of every word she didn't know into an empty notebook. She had forgotten how to type, and using a computer took forever. She would often write sentences with words that she didn't plan to use. Sarah's brain damage occurred in the language zone where the left parietal lobe met the temporal lobe. She struggled to understand written English for a couple of years after the accident. Each day she copied from her books and conducted what she believed to be important research. This was the reason she locked herself away from the world and stopped seeing her friends. But really, she could not let them see the person she had become. Sarah met someone in the park who was doing a thesis on head injuries and told her about how the brain repairs itself after trauma. After her chance meeting, this was her hope for her brain.
The next large chunk of time still remains a mystery for Sarah. While working on her PhD, she decided to travel, however, does not remember much. She remembers her job-hunting experience. She often used two expressions to trick people into thinking she was okay. First, she gave a long serious look or second, a look of mild curiosity. She had lost the art of conversation. Around 10-12 months after her injury, she accepted the job of policy director with a nonprofit organization in aged care. She was doing well until she was asked to give a presentation and take questions in front of a live audience. She was nervous, spoke too fast, and fumbled for answers. Later she approached her boss with a proposal: I will write the presentations, and you can give them. She learned to adapt and keep her brain injury a secret.
Sarah's personality and cognition changed. She found it hard to think, concentrate, and remember. Her charm disappeared along with her humor. Her impulse control vanished, and she had an unexpected side effect of craving sex. She explored her sexuality and drank heavily. Then she met Laura, an extrovert that made conversation easy. After ten weeks, they moved in together. Sarah loved her dogs, as they offered her unconditional positive regard. While Laura liked dogs, she believed they should be outside. These differences festered under the surface. Laura helped push Sarah to finish her PhD. She helped her break the material into small chunks, supported her, and brought her food. It was at Laura's suggestion that Sarah applied for a fellowship to live and study in the United States for a year. The distraction of a new city helped Sarah to forget about her depression and rage. She spent her days wandering the streets and exploring neighborhoods, but struggled to come up with a topic for her research and did not get along with her mentor. She met a friend that suggested that she transfer and finish her coursework under a friendlier mentor. She made the transfer, and at Harvard, she completed her case study for her dissertation.
Back in Australia, it had been four years since her accident, and she was starting to feel normal. On paper, no one would suspect that she had a damaged brain. In 1999, she became the HR manager at one of the largest papers in Australia. In 2000, she earned her PhD. In just five years, she achieved what she once thought was impossible. However, her temper started to become a roadblock. Because she could not control her anger, her relationship with Laura deteriorated. Sarah started to have affairs. In hopes of saving their relationship, she took a new job and moved with Laura to Melbourne. Within a few months, they separated, and Sarah had to put down one another of her beloved dogs.
In 2004, Sarah moved to Singapore. She was not ashamed about her sexuality but fiercely guarded the truth about her brain injury. Stigma exists around those with head injuries, such as being viewed as intellectually challenged, violent, unpredictable, and untrustworthy. This time of Sarah's life was marked by loneliness, travel, problems with her mother, and learning that she lost the ability to play violin. Years after her accident, she was still discovering new brain problems. Sarah met Giulia, who was 15 years younger. Quickly they fall in love, and Sarah shared her secret about her brain disorder. In 2008, Sarah took a job with a big Tobacco Company and moved to Hong Kong. Nine months later, Giulia moved there as well. Life began to resemble normalcy for Sarah.
In 2010, Sarah recognized problems with her memory. She was concerned she had Alzheimer's disease or CTE. She struggled with words and could not spell anymore. Her writing had become awkward. She went to the doctor and had another MRI done. There was no evidence for Alzheimer's disease, but there was significant atrophy around the motor cortex and some atrophy around the posterior parietal region and parieto-occipital cortex. She was told to cut back on alcohol, exercise four times a week, read, write, keep working, and take up a foreign language. She was also advised to keep a positive outlook. Sarah was consumed with her symptoms. She was told that for many smart people, it is hard for others to notice a decline. Frustrated with Sarah's moods and preoccupation with her symptoms, Giulia left her. Sarah retreated from life and stayed at home with her dogs and cats.
In 2013, at the age of 50, Sarah was researching euthanasia and considering ending her life. Soon after, she traveled to Sydney to see her neurologist and have more tests done. The MRI revealed that the brain changes were very slow and only in the area where she had her accident. It did not appear she had dementia, but the doctor wanted to run tests again in four years. Writing saved her brain after her accident, now she needed to get back to writing. Nothing stopped her depression, like helping an animal in need. She rescued a stray dog and named him Scout. Having a puppy helped her think about her life ten years into the future. She wanted to move back to Australia and reconcile her relationship with her mother. However, her mother's health and cognitive abilities were deteriorating, and it was taking a toll on Sarah. She started to see a psychiatrist who offered her some hope.
Sarah was lonely, so she tried online dating, but it didn't work. Finally, she met Louis, who happened to be a psycho-geriatrician specializing in dementia. Sarah told her the truth, and they fell quickly in love. Louis helped convince her that she did not have dementia. TBIs are complicated, and every TBI is different. Every brain is different. She pointed out Sarah wasted seven years worrying about something that didn't happened. She also helped Sarah navigate the relationship with her mother. In 2017, Louis and Sarah married in New York City. They live in Sydney and lead a simple life. On Sarah's wall is a quote by Norman Cousins: The tragedy of life is not death, but what we let die inside us while we live. Sarah decided to skip her next brain scan and live her life without fear.
Other Related Resources
Author's Website
https://sarahvallance.com/
BBC Outlook
https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/w3csyfcx
Psychological Concepts and Figures
ADHD
Aggression
Alcohol
Alzheimer's disease
Antidepressants
Autobiographical memory
Chronic traumatic encephalopathy (CTE)
Compensation
Concussion
Dementia
Depression
Dysphasia
Electroencephalogram (EEG)
Glasgow Coma Scale
Grammar
Impulse control
Insomnia
Introvert
IQ
Morphine
MRI
Musical alexia
Pain
Parietal lobe
Pica
Plasticity
Psychiatrist
Psychometric tests
Retrograde amnesia
Serial memory
Sexuality
Spectroscopy
Suicide
Syntax
Traumatic brain injury (TBI)
Unconditional positive regard
Visuospatial skills
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